Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Why are There Even Cows in the Ocean?



Marc Seal
Professor Rau
ENG 101 MD
December 16, 2014
Dear Stupid Cows,

            I Feel for you, I really do. Everyone has personal irks and pet peeves. For some this can be an easy thing to overcome. For others, such as myself it can feel as if you are the only fish in an ocean overpopulated by mentally disabled, blind cows. All whom cannot swim without children’s floaties. So please stupid drowning cow humans... leave my existence, you hinder intelligent development.
            My biggest pet peeve is blatant stupidity. Not the kind of misstep such as your friend accidentally leaving the gas pump in his car while pulling away, or pumping diesel into a civic even though the pump is larger than the car’s gas port. I am speaking of the kind of raw stupidity that only an uneducated bunch of animals can display… except these animals tend to be dressed in the “hottest” new clothing lines. This level of stupidity transcends all stereotypes. Rich, Poor, seemingly well educated, and individuals from every imaginable background have outliers that portray this lack of true intelligence. These are the kinds of people who will argue a point on quantum physics with a scientist who earned their doctorate in that very field. Even when the only experience that very special individual has with it is via “The Big Bang Theory”, and I mean the show, not the actual event. Everyone knows the level of stupidity I’m speaking of, if you don’t, perhaps you shouldn’t be reading this?

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